It's that time of year again where everyone reflects on the past year and sets goals for the new year. For women going through a divorce, this can be a particularly difficult time emotionally. It can be hard to look back on the year with a positive attitude when dealing with the stress and challenges of a divorce. However, there are ways to take control of this situation and make the most of an end-of-year review. As a Divorce Coach, Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and the Divorce Sherpa, Sophie Helenek, I see firsthand what works and what doesn't work when it comes to an end-of-year divorce review.
In this blog post, I’ll share some important points to reflect upon as you end this year and enter the next phase of your life.
Reflect on Your Emotional Journey:
Divorce is an emotional rollercoaster, and it’s important to acknowledge and process those emotions as they arise. Take some time to reflect on how you’ve been feeling throughout the year. Did you experience any unexpected emotions? Were there specific moments or events that triggered strong feelings? Journaling, therapy, or talking to trusting friends or family members can help you understand and identify what you’re feeling. By acknowledging your emotions, you’ll be able to identify triggers, avoid harmful behavior, and ultimately heal from the emotional toll of the divorce.
Evaluate Your Financial Situation:
Divorce can wreak havoc on your finances, so it’s essential to get a clear view of your financial situation. Review your budget, expenses, debts, and assets. Make a new budget taking into account any changes in your income or expenses. Hire a financial professional if needed to ensure that you are financially prepared for the future. A Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) can work with your divorce lawyer, ensure you fully understand your financial options, and give you an impartial opinion on any financial proposals submitted to you.
Look Back on Your Legal Process:
Legal processes can be overwhelming and often confusing, but it’s important to review what happened during the year. Did you experience any delays? Did any unexpected changes occur? Did your final settlement feel equitable? Take note of these items and determine with the help of a family law attorney or a divorce coach if there are any action steps you should be taking to improve your outcome.
Reflect on Your Parenting Journey:
If you have children, reflect on how your parenting relationship changed over the course of the year. Did you establish a routine that worked well for both parents? Did you encounter any conflicts during the process? Has there been any development, positive or negative concerning your children that you need to address? With this information on hand, make a goal to focus on your child’s needs moving forward, rather than focusing on past grievances.
Look Forward to the Future:
After looking to your past experiences, it’s time to focus on the future. Create a goals list for yourself, whether it be travel plans, personal goals or professional aspirations. Think about the future and what exactly you want to achieve. When you write them down, these goals will become intentions that link to your aspirations and dreams. It acts as a roadmap by encouraging purpose, focus and helps with goal achievement.
In summary, as the year comes to a close, it’s a great chance to start reflecting on our experiences as a path to personal growth and improvements while planning for what is to come. By reflecting on our emotional journey, financial situation, legal process, parenting journey, and looking forward to the future, we can learn valuable lessons from the past, make better decisions, and set clear goals for ourselves. Remember, with the right mindset and support system, you can make the New Year the beginning of a new chapter in your life filled with self-love, personal growth, and prosperity.
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